Chapter 14. A Leprechaun and Sasquatch

*DISCLAIMER** This is MY interpretation of this date. My readers have also gotten to know Single Steve…and admire his blog. Though our date did NOT go well, please refrain from saying mean things etc. I’m sure he’s still a good person…or whatever.

Chapter 14. A Leprechaun and Sasquatch

I’m 5’8″ I embrace my height….but, I have these boots, and they put me quite a bit taller. I love it. They are sexy and I rock them like no one’s business…apparently Single Steve does NOT like this.

So here we go, on to our first date.

I walk out to him, and greet him.

I go to give him a hug and he says:

“Wow, you ARE tall” I got it, right then…he looked scared. “Is my height a problem? Great…is he shaking??” I thought.

I get in his “car”

that he didn’t even open the door for me for….

http://yfrog.com/3nlaptj

This is going to be interesting. I mean, I’m not that TALL right? I get it Lucky the Leprechaun, you can’t handle this tall drink of water…

I knew it wouldn’t take long before I would be chewing this guy up and spitting him out.

I didn’t care about the fact that he was shorter than me, until he brought up my height..I could have saved us both some time and brought out a box of Lucky Charms. After all, they ARE magically delicious and isn’t that what Leprechauns like to eat? I decided to go anyway…hoping maybe in the back of his white panel van, would be a nice pot of gold and he would use some of that to take me on a nice date.

Nope…

He said we were going to Subway…I don’t know if he was joking or not…but I quickly said no and told him to take me somewhere else. Thankfully (for him) he did.

Now we are at a nice place with a view…but he’s not over the height… “How tall are you?”

Now, I’M over it…

So those that know me, know once I’m done, I’m done…just like with the date in New York…there was a point, I got so bored, I fell asleep on my date..literally on him…and drooled…yeah I said it..drooled..Now, NORMALLY, I would have been embarrassed but all I said was “oops, my bad” because I just didn’t care anymore.

Same in this case. I didn’t really care if he liked me or not at that point…so I took his food. I didn’t ask, I was just like “btw, I’m gonna steal your food” and I pulled his plate toward me http://tweetphoto.com/10444702 I may have even chewed with my mouth open. Fuck being classy!

He started talking about his life,his job, his dating, I kept interrupting him as I had already lost interest.. He probably thought I was a bitch..oh well.

I started texting friends, balancing my checkbook, flossing my teeth etc…

While I was doing that and leisurely checking twitter and facebook, I saw some of his tweets:

” Man eater alert”

“Who doesn’t want to go to subway!?”

“By the way, I’m going to steal your food”

“Dinner was delcious. She keeps checking phone, I think she’s talking to her other boyfriend. ”

“Turns out she’s a foot taller than me. #sasquatch ”

Wow…well you know what shorty, don’t be mad at me because Milk did MY body good and we needed to ask the waiter for a high chair for you ok?

Dinner was brief. When we left. I said “Well thank you for dinner anyway”

He responded with “Thank you for being a giant!”

REALLY!? WHAT THE FUCK EVER DUDE! I should have been the one driving. Isn’t there a certain height requirement for YOU to be OUT of a car seat?

When he drops me off…I gracefully thank him…. and as I’m getting out..he throws on some Mariah Carey, “Why You So Obsessed With Me” TURNS IT UP SUPER LOUD..points at me…and speeds off…all while some of my neighbors watched…I jolted upstairs, ran inside my house hoping no one saw me, as to avoid embarrassing questions later…

I got inside barely got on my computer to see that he wasted no time and posted these few tweets:

“Headed to Millers Field, hope to meet a girl that’s not a giant. Drinking my sorrows away.”

Are you fucking joking me!? He acted like meeting with me was something out of Attack of the 50 Foot Woman OHH THE MONSTROSITY! I’m 5 feet 8 inches..not 50 feet dude!

Stop.whining. Steve. I’m not that much taller than him. I think he’s just mad because I didn’t want to make out..and I said “Well if you can reach me, you can kiss me”….he couldn’t.

Height has never been an issue with guys I have dated! I have dated shorter! I dated a guy that was 5’4” but I didn’t care and he didn’t care either. I don’t think anyone has ever had an issue with my height. Guess some guys do though. I like being tall…the air is fresher up here ok!?;)

Sooooo…

Single Steve shall remain…Single Steve and I will remain single..and jolly 😉

13 comments for “Chapter 14. A Leprechaun and Sasquatch

  1. February 5, 2010 at 11:18 pm

    OK, I was following your Tweets on the date, and I have to admit, I thought you guys were playing with the crowd…

    I stand corrected, I was just watching a greek tragedy unfold. 🙂

  2. February 5, 2010 at 11:27 pm

    You continue to crack me up with every one of your blogs! I look forward to the next, my friend.

  3. February 5, 2010 at 11:51 pm

    Height on a woman has never intimidated me. For the most part I always dated shorties. My wife is the first woman that I have dated that is almost as tall as me. She’s about an 1 1/2 inches shorted than me and when she wears heels she’s about my height, which I think is SUPER SEXY!! I’d throw myself at a taller woman. Nothing sexier than high heels on a tall woman and them sexy legs!! HMMM!!!! Thats not enough to keep me from a woman or even opening the door for her like the gentleman that I am.

    It seems like this whole date for him was just a clusterfuck! Wow. Even if he didn’t take kindly to you, he could of still left a good mark, you know, for a recomendation to a friend or something. and LoLo you’re a HOT looking gal, he should of been treating you like a princess!

    Let me tell you this, this isnt what all guys in San Diego are like, don’t stereotype us all.

    I can tell you one thing, had I been single I would of taken you out on a date and blown you away. No Im not being cocky, But I am very confident. I put my wife in the same category of sexyness as you. I moved quick, won her heart and married her. Confidence is key.

    @socalmario
    facebook.com/zugasti

  4. Renee
    February 5, 2010 at 11:54 pm

    Love the story……..we should all be thanking single steve for the date as he gave you some new writing material that may help someone else out in the future…….so for that “Thank You Steve”

  5. February 6, 2010 at 1:35 am

    First of all, Lori I love your blog. Its so entertaining – and I enjoy following along with your adventures. This one was just a little ridiculous, but you did say to refrain from saying any mean things – so maybe I’ll give you my full thoughts in person.

    For now I just wanted to stop by and say you rock, you deserve so much better than a guy who tweeting trash about you, while you’re sitting with him. That spells c-l-a-s-s all the way. You’re a DIVA now, and you’re getting ready to take over the world.

    Mr. Right will show himself when you are ready for him. For now you need to go on these dates and report back to the masses so when you do meet mr right, you will appreciate him that much more. 🙂 love ya girly

  6. February 6, 2010 at 11:18 am

    Hey, love both sides of the date, quite the stories… I knew it would be quite the clusterfuck of a date after seeing Steve’s site and reading some of his posts, quite funny sometimes, but def not a guy that you Lolo would take to very kindly 😉

    I think he’s a jester, making fun in times of surprise or nervousness, and unfortunately doesn’t come across very well, esp on a date when both are tweeting away how they really feel.

    I do applaud Steve’s apparent humor over the situation, and for still paying for dinner after knowing it’s gone downhill. It was a great try, and a great story. 🙂

  7. February 8, 2010 at 12:01 pm

    So.. I have to say it, after reading both blogs I have come to a conclusion.

    You are both to blame for this mess. What kind of self-absorbed nutbag tweets WHILE ON AN EFFING DATE.

    Oh sorry perspective match, I gotta update my shit about whatever tiny flaws I’ve found in you so far.

    Steve, get over the height thing. Single Girl (who I don’t know in real life) you don’t strap on your war boots when you are going to meet someone who wont shut the eff up about how he is self-conscious about his height.

    The mistake you both made was dragging your blog persona along with you. Be real people next time, don’t tweet until AFTER the date, and you may be pleasantly surprised.

  8. February 9, 2010 at 7:14 pm

    Had he tanken you to the restaurant I suggested (and wore the helmet cams), things obviously would have gone better…

  9. February 12, 2010 at 1:19 pm

    I don’t understand how difficult it is for dudes to have some class. If the date is not going well there’s no need to be a dick. It’s just a couple hours out of your life.

    Maybe I am blessed that my mother raised me properly.

  10. HinkDog411
    February 13, 2010 at 9:47 am

    I’m 5′-10″ tall, even when I do meet a woman who is taller than me, I don’t have any issues with it, in fact, it usually puts me in an advantageous position during slow dances, hugs, etc……….what an idiot that guy is! Besides the fact that he kept mentioning your height, he seemed to be the one who was obsessed…..with your height! And SUBWAY????? Who takes a first date to SUBWAY??? Reminds me of an old co-worker who was trying to be a player….he took a girl to, and I swear this is the truth….”E-Z Take Out Burger”, it used to be on Genesee just north of Balboa…..I took MY date, and yes, it was also a first date, to Fillippi’s in Pacific Beach for a nice candlelight dinner, and when she needed to put gas in her car, I got out and pumped it for her (which I still do for her, some 16 years later!).

    Anyway, Love your blog Lori, great insight and humor!

  11. Kat
    February 18, 2010 at 12:17 pm

    People keep saying what a great guy singlesteve is… probably, his blog seems interesting enough… but the fact he couldn’t get over your height is really, really annoying. As a 5’9″ girl I can relate. If Steve can’t turn off his ‘joker’ mode, even for a second, that doesn’t help either. My guy is 5’8″ and is never intimidated by me or my heels. Hopefully you’ll find an awesome confident guy one day – or just a really tall one!

  12. April 8, 2010 at 11:40 am

    Read your version, read Steve’s version — and um, I think we’ve discovered why Steve is single. Homeboy needs to upgrade the car and lifestyle to find a girl that fits his expectations.

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