“Why Don’t You Want To Date Me?!”

So I did it, made the dreaded phone call to “break up” with my boyfriend…. of two WHOLE…dates.

Why was I breaking up with a guy I only went out with twice? Because he was already naming our children and I needed to put a stop to it.  I called him and went into it immediately…

“I know I told you where I was at in the beginning but I just wanted to be up front with you again because I know you are making all these plans and I don’t want to lead you on. I had a great couple of dates with you but I don’t think I should be dating, it’ s not really a priority and I don’t want to be a girl using you for company, dinners, or anything. I hope you understand.”

He immediately responded with: “No, I don’t understand. Why don’t you want to date me?! Explain this to me.”

Whoa buddy, what the hell? It took everything in me not to laugh at that…and that would have been the most he’s made me laugh.

I proceeded to explain. Not much though. Just enough to get him to understand I wasn’t interested.  After breaking it down, I thought for sure he had it now…

“I had a great time with you, but I wouldn’t think much of it afterwards. That should say something about our connection, or lack there of, and a lot about where I am right now. I don’t want to be the rude girl who blows you off, so I am being up front now.”

Nope, he didn’t get it.

“Why couldn’t you make an exception for me?…That doesn’t make sense.”

Oh you bet I was done explaining myself at this point….

“Listen, I am not explaining myself to you, or anyone else ok? I am calling to thank you for being nice to me but I am also calling to let you know this won’t be going any further.”

He stayed quiet for a bit and then said ” Well enjoy getting acclimated here in LA…take care, bye.”

Damn. All that nagging and drama and I didn’t even get any sex out of it. What a waste. I should be given a fucking medal of  AWESOME for this one.



12 comments for ““Why Don’t You Want To Date Me?!”

  1. June 15, 2011 at 3:37 pm

    At least you were up front with him. You don’t really care for him and there’s nothing wrong with that.

    • June 15, 2011 at 3:51 pm

      Thank you! That’s all I was trying to do…I knew either way I’d come out losing with this one. He just didn’t want to hear it.

  2. Kristian
    June 15, 2011 at 3:55 pm

    Just telling from his response or not getting it, you know you made the right decision. Oh and that the “connection” for sure wasn’t there because he couldn’t put two and two together when you clearly were trying to be nice to him.

    Kudos to you. 🙂

    Oh and thanks for the laugh, that literally gave me a quick burst of energy that should get me through the last 30 min of my workday. hahahaha

  3. June 15, 2011 at 3:56 pm

    Sometimes it is hard to hear the truth but I would rather hear the truth then have someone lie to me.

    And I have to agree with you, if he was already naming your children after two dates, I would have walked away too even though I would like to date someone long term. Two dates is to soon to start making those plans.

    I applaud you for telling him the truth and walking away.

  4. June 15, 2011 at 4:44 pm

    LOL wow. His reply screamed, “I’m needy, insecure and THIRSTY.” Good for you for being straight…no medal for “AWESOMENESS”, but good for you 😉 I’d be interested to learn what you two did for the first couple of dates. In other words, what did he spend? And what was your TRUE impression of the guy?

    • June 15, 2011 at 4:58 pm

      This is how our first two dates went…I offered to treat him the 3rd time we went out..but he just got too attached too soon. 1st two dates we went to dinner.

      • June 15, 2011 at 5:02 pm

        Not to challenge your wisdom, but don’t you think a first date would have been better spent in more of a casual setting like a starbucks or at a park? I guess I’m asking the wrong person…I’d be interested to see what he would say.

        • June 15, 2011 at 5:18 pm

          I normally would have on a blind date but he had already met me. He seemed nice and after a phone conversation, He said “I’d like to take you to dinner” I thought if he had been so nice and charming, and no one had ever been that bold with me to just state what they wanted, I thought it was refreshing…..I just thought he would have been funny too…wrong. I just wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt,but it backfired.

  5. July 6, 2011 at 10:13 pm

    Dang lolo, you did the right thing and he ultimately had no comeback and sort of backed off in the end. Just gotta keep plugging away. Just go for “needs and wants” right now maybe you’ll stumble upon someone great, it sounds a lil selfish but it should be all about what you need and want right now.
    I’m learning that when you truly care about someone and they care about you then you start providing for some of their needs and wants. 🙂

  6. July 9, 2011 at 1:08 pm

    Sooooooooooo I guess this means that the NEXT time a dude stops you in traffic… he better be some kind of medical doctor who can clone…..

    We can clone Antonio…. and sell him to other singles….LOL!
    It’s cliche to say, but when you are READY for someone…. they kinda just magically appear (or someone will introduce you to him)…..
    In the meantime….. Antonio says he “willing to help a friend out”…. (yeah I pinched him for that comment!)

  7. Aide45
    July 18, 2011 at 11:25 am

    Lol good call on “breaking up” with him; he sounded like he was taking everything too personally and was more concerned about comforting himself than actually understanding you. It goes to show you that a guy who is not understanding of himself cannot be able to understand you or your feelings in general. Not sure about the whole sex comment at the end, but still lol.

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