My friend Lili and I were talking about one of our friends that just got engaged and we began going down the list of our friends who are getting married, have gotten married, or are in these serious relationships where we don’t see them anymore aka…”SELLING OUT”
Well we went down the list and alot of our friends are performing this disgusting action or as Diddy would put it…”Have caught a serious case of Bitchassness” and when we thought about it, it’s like her and I are one of the last ones left who haven’t sold out…so we made an agreement….literally, a contract. We each came up with our own versions and presented them to each other….I thought mine was only fair as it had a time limit and figured that if we both had someone we were happy with, we could prevent eachother from this horrible disease and keep eachother on track but alas, she informed there is no cure for this and even if we both had significant others…we would be too vulnerable and catch this disease.She has my best interest in mind so I’m signing her version!
Here is mine.
I Lorena M. Lopez and Liliana Cruz agree to remain single until the other has found an equal amount of happiness in a partner. If one is unhappy, the other is forbidden to commit to their partner. Commitment is defined as: too many evenings alone with one boy, discussing of “love” for a boy, performing duties of that of a future wife or girlfriend i.e. Cleaning for them, cooking for them, missing out on important functions for them (vegging out at said parties houses), or anything else that would constitute Bitchassness or selling out. Lori and Lili are sole property of each other and said parties will remain so until written consent of both parties stating the release of each other and all liabilities.
(For complete definiton of Selling out please refer to paragraph 14a).
X______________X_________________
Here is hers…
It is understood by both parties herein. lorena lopez and liliana cruz that no selling out will occur in this life time nor the next. Under the condition that parties named herein satisfy the following: Going down, fabulous dates, and occational dibble dabble of the opposite sex. Parties acknowledge, and are bound by such agreement now and until eternity.Failing to comply with such agreement will cause the offender to be thrown of the San Francisco Bridge
X____________ X_________________________
She quickly felt the need to correct me as mine had a time limit, she said, “NO BITCH…THIS IS FOREVER!”
LOL LOL…no but seriously to our friends who are in committed relationships, engaged, or married, we are happy for you….I guess.-Lori and Lili 🙂